we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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