Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize