Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
