I want to stick my p in your. b.
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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