just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
