kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Randomize
