so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Randomize
