Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
