I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
All I want is dick and wine.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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