What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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