she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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