He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
What a dumb baby whore.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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