Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
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