I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
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