My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
