We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
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