she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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