My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
Panties = found
Randomize
