i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
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