why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
