yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Randomize
