i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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