Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Randomize
