...so i touched it.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
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