I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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