these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
