I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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