I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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