i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Randomize
