you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
