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Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
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