Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Randomize
