I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize