Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Randomize
