Are we in a gay sports bar?
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
