Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
Girls should come with a carfax report
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
