you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize
