what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Randomize