I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
