You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize
