It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
