don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
Randomize
