Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
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