the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
She announced her abortion via fbk
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
