I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
