i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
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