Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
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