She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Randomize
