More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
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