it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
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