Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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